People may think that they can't live with their hurts, with the loss and the sadness, that little voice that sometimes creeps up in the back of your mind to remind you of all the negative things. But it's still a part of us, what makes us who we are. I know I've talked about my feelings on loss, about my somewhat unhealthy coping mechanism, but I will tell you, to feel nothing is so much worse.
I'm not sure that the darkness I saw was the same sort of Darkness that I witnessed try to obliterate everything around us, but in that moment, it took everything. All those emotions, even the bad ones, the sadness, the fear- suddenly they were all just -gone-. I won't lie, it was freeing in its own way. Not caring about anything? About all the things that had been bothering you, about the people who forgot, or the things that should be done? It's a huge weight off your shoulders. But then there's nothing left on the other side of that, and it is oh so very cold.
That's not who I am. If that's a hint of 7, I don't want to be him.
I know I've been avoiding talking about it. For me it feels like there's nothing to talk about. We all got pulled into something crazy, and thankfully we were able to break free of it. Things are back to normal now, or at least that's what I'd like to say. It's strange when you have an extra set of memories knocking around in your head. I remember things about pre-Golden Age culture that I have no business knowing. Makes me wonder what all everyone else is dealing with. Maybe I'm simplifying too much, but I'll just be happy that no one looks at me crosseyed. In the meantime, the bar's getting popular. Wasn't really my intention at least in reason, but if it helps people out a little, well, I'm fine with that.
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061021
β'π πβ΄π πππβ― ππ½πΆπ ππ½β― πΉπΆπππβ―ππ β ππΆπ ππΆπ ππ½β― ππΆπβ― πβ΄ππ β΄π» ππΆπππβ―ππ ππ½πΆπ β ππΎππβ―ππβ―πΉ πππ πβ΄ β΄π·ππΎπβ―ππΆπβ― β―πβ―ππππ½πΎπβ πΆπβ΄πππΉ ππ, π·ππ πΎπ ππ½πΆπ πβ΄πβ―ππ, πΎπ πβ΄β΄π β―πβ―ππππ½πΎπβ. πππ ππ½β΄πβ― β―πβ΄ππΎβ΄ππ, β―πβ―π ππ½β― π·πΆπΉ β΄πβ―π, ππ½β― ππΆπΉπβ―ππ, ππ½β― π»β―πΆπ- πππΉπΉβ―πππ ππ½β―π πβ―πβ― πΆππ πΏπππ -ββ΄πβ―-. β πβ΄π'π ππΎβ―, πΎπ ππΆπ π»πβ―β―πΎπβ πΎπ πΎππ β΄ππ ππΆπ. π©β΄π πΈπΆππΎπβ πΆπ·β΄ππ πΆππππ½πΎπβ? ππ·β΄ππ πΆππ ππ½β― ππ½πΎπβπ ππ½πΆπ π½πΆπΉ π·β―β―π π·β΄ππ½β―ππΎπβ πβ΄π, πΆπ·β΄ππ ππ½β― π β―β΄π πβ― ππ½β΄ π»β΄πββ΄π, β΄π ππ½β― ππ½πΎπβπ ππ½πΆπ ππ½β΄πππΉ π·β― πΉβ΄πβ―? βπ'π πΆ π½πββ― πβ―πΎβπ½π β΄π»π» πβ΄ππ ππ½β΄πππΉβ―ππ. β¬ππ ππ½β―π ππ½β―πβ―'π πβ΄ππ½πΎπβ πβ―π»π β΄π ππ½β― β΄ππ½β―π ππΎπΉβ― β΄π» ππ½πΆπ, πΆππΉ πΎπ πΎπ β΄π½ πβ΄ πβ―ππ πΈβ΄ππΉ.
π―π½πΆπ'π πβ΄π ππ½β΄ β πΆπ. βπ» ππ½πΆπ'π πΆ π½πΎππ β΄π» 7, β πΉβ΄π'π ππΆππ πβ΄ π·β― π½πΎπ.
β ππβ΄π β'πβ― π·β―β―π πΆπβ΄πΎπΉπΎπβ ππΆπππΎπβ πΆπ·β΄ππ πΎπ. β±β΄π πβ― πΎπ π»β―β―ππ ππΎπβ― ππ½β―πβ―'π πβ΄ππ½πΎπβ πβ΄ ππΆππ πΆπ·β΄ππ. π²β― πΆππ ββ΄π π πππβ―πΉ πΎππβ΄ πβ΄πβ―ππ½πΎπβ πΈππΆππ, πΆππΉ ππ½πΆπππ»ππππ πβ― πβ―πβ― πΆπ·πβ― πβ΄ π·πβ―πΆπ π»πβ―β― β΄π» πΎπ. π―π½πΎπβπ πΆπβ― π·πΆπΈπ πβ΄ πβ΄πππΆπ πβ΄π, β΄π πΆπ πβ―πΆππ ππ½πΆπ'π ππ½πΆπ β'πΉ ππΎπβ― πβ΄ ππΆπ. βπ'π ππππΆπββ― ππ½β―π πβ΄π π½πΆπβ― πΆπ β―ππππΆ πβ―π β΄π» πβ―πβ΄ππΎβ―π ππβ΄πΈππΎπβ πΆπβ΄πππΉ πΎπ πβ΄ππ π½β―πΆπΉ. β πβ―πβ―ππ·β―π ππ½πΎπβπ πΆπ·β΄ππ π πβ―-π’β΄ππΉβ―π πββ― πΈπππππβ― ππ½πΆπ β π½πΆπβ― πβ΄ π·πππΎπβ―ππ ππβ΄ππΎπβ. β³πΆπβ―π πβ― πβ΄ππΉβ―π ππ½πΆπ πΆππ β―πβ―ππβ΄πβ― β―ππβ― πΎπ πΉβ―πΆππΎπβ ππΎππ½. β³πΆππ·β― β'π ππΎππ ππΎπ»ππΎπβ πβ΄β΄ πππΈπ½, π·ππ β'ππ πΏπππ π·β― π½πΆπ π π ππ½πΆπ πβ΄ β΄πβ― πβ΄β΄ππ πΆπ πβ― πΈπβ΄ππβ―πβ―πΉ. βπ ππ½β― πβ―πΆπππΎπβ―, ππ½β― π·πΆπ'π ββ―πππΎπβ π β΄π πππΆπ. π²πΆππ'π πβ―πΆπππ ππ πΎππβ―πππΎβ΄π πΆπ πβ―πΆππ πΎπ πβ―πΆπβ΄π, π·ππ πΎπ» πΎπ π½β―ππ π π β―β΄π πβ― β΄ππ πΆ ππΎπππβ―, πβ―ππ, β'π π»πΎπβ― ππΎππ½ ππ½πΆπ.
no subject
I'm not sure that the darkness I saw was the same sort of Darkness that I witnessed try to obliterate everything around us, but in that moment, it took everything. All those emotions, even the bad ones, the sadness, the fear- suddenly they were all just -gone-. I won't lie, it was freeing in its own way. Not caring about anything? About all the things that had been bothering you, about the people who forgot, or the things that should be done? It's a huge weight off your shoulders. But then there's nothing left on the other side of that, and it is oh so very cold.
That's not who I am. If that's a hint of 7, I don't want to be him.
I know I've been avoiding talking about it. For me it feels like there's nothing to talk about. We all got pulled into something crazy, and thankfully we were able to break free of it. Things are back to normal now, or at least that's what I'd like to say. It's strange when you have an extra set of memories knocking around in your head. I remember things about pre-Golden Age culture that I have no business knowing. Makes me wonder what all everyone else is dealing with. Maybe I'm simplifying too much, but I'll just be happy that no one looks at me crosseyed. In the meantime, the bar's getting popular. Wasn't really my intention at least in reason, but if it helps people out a little, well, I'm fine with that.